Thoughts after the Big Question

This is kind of a long one...sorry!  Guess I had more to say than I originally thought :)

I have recently experienced that one day that little girls dream of: the love of my life bent down on one knee and asked me to marry him!  We took a hike in the state park where we first said "I love you" and were forced to take shelter under a tree because of a storm.  He decided that this was a good spot (read: his nerves wouldn't survive much longer) and he popped the question :) We realized the tree was one stump with two separate trunks and it felt like a fairy tale with the rain pouring down around us and such a romantic detail that we couldn't have planned for.

Our tree

Immediately after the big question...the view under our tree :)

Since then it has been the expected happiness in our families and friends and the more unexpected onslaught of negative opinions.  Michael and I only met in January and then started dating in mid-March....we got engaged the day after our 4-month anniversary.

In today's world, this is a very short amount of time to determine whether you want to spend your entire life with someone!  I've heard people tell me that I shouldn't even consider someone until I have lived with them for 2 years.  LIVED with them for 2 years.  That means we should have been dating for any number of months/years before moving in.

I've also heard that I shouldn't marry someone if I've never had sex with them....what if there is no chemistry? (I defer anyone with THAT opinion to this article, compliments of my SIL Steph....and US News: Devout Catholics Have Better Sex, Study Says).

Mostly, though, I just get the raised eyebrows and the "Well, congrats!" while the actual opinion goes unsaid.

I find that these opinions all point to the terrible loneliness that people in this world feel.  I feel that Hollywood rom-coms and romance novels have a big part of the blame- they all paint an unrealistic view of what romance should be and make you feel as though you are settling for less than you deserve if you don't have flowers everyday and a house in the suburbs your first year of marriage.  Then divorce is as easy and acceptable as shopping at the mall, for whatever little reason you can think of.

The other big culprit is pornography.  Its everywhere, even in advertisements, giving both men and women unrealistic views as to what they should expect from their mate.  Humble marriage doesn't stand a chance against these shiny holograms!  Such an attack can only be coordinated by the Enemy; and the Enemy fights hardest against that which is most important!

I understand all the fears, and have of course entertained a few myself.  However, I have something that most people in this day and age have unfortunately deemed archaic and too simple to work: I have faith.

I have faith that even though I don't know everything about Michael, the things I do know give me a pretty good idea of what to expect.  There are things that will come as surprises down the road, and maybe I would find these things out if I lived with him for a couple years before saying yes, but these things won't change the fact that I love this man.  And true love is supposed to be unconditional!  Besides, people change and I feel its a pretty safe bet to say that in 5 years, and again at 10 years, and so on, we will look back on the people we are now and marvel at how different we are.

The point is, if you are meant to be together, you know pretty quick.  If you aren't, any amount of time spent with them beforehand isn't going to change that.

However, just because you are meant for each other doesn't mean its always rainbows and sunshine, but don't let that be an invitation for you to throw in the towel!  It takes work; but I am so confident that its the best...and most rewarding....work I could ever hope for :)